Welcome to my Blog

This is the space where I give you some insight into my personal life and what is important to me. Seem voyeuristic….well it is and that is what makes it fabulous in  a way. Whatever is written here is for me to share myself with you and what makes me live up to my name of KickarseKate. Leave some comments for me if you liek what you read, and most of all enjoy….oh yeah and if you feel in need of some inspirational coaching ramblings you can find that too, or visit my website for the more work related stuff.

To get a fabulous complimentary course on HOW TO CHANGE ONE THING  then visit my website on www.life-coaching.co.za

Is a Pin Prick Size Hole Enough?

Where do you get YOUR insights into Life from?

I find that when I am going about my normal day to day activity I get the most incredible insights that translate into interesting ideas for a post.  Well at least I think so.

So at sparrows this morning i was in POWER yoga simply because BIKRAM was not on at the ungodly hour……you cannot imagine what we had to entice our bodies to do. Feet with back to wall, in down dog pose ( don’t get any rude ideas now!) and then walk your feet back UP the wall behind you….so that you are at right angles to the floor. Um yes. And then hold the pose for a full minute.

Then we had to do another 4 strenuous poses each for a minute,a dn that concluded ONE cyCLE> back to the beginning, and right angle with ass in air yet again. The wierd thing is that even as my energy was battling and shoulders shaking, each time i did it I was able to hold it for longer and longer, getting to the full minute at the last and final FIFTH time we  went through the cycle. Now in most exercise routines you get weaker and your energy flags as you go deeper…….but I found a PIN PRICK of a hole in my yoga mat, in between the webbing and went into minute focus.

It was also about power of the mind (maybe the name of the yoga automatically demands it inherently)  as I started repeating I am doggedly determined and will stay in the pose. Shewwwwweeee

So do you need to find the smallest pin prick of a hole somewhere in your life to hold a focus so that you can complete something??

Have a beautiful day.

Positive Insignificance

Today was a special day for me. ..a rare day off and a treat to spend it in the amazing company of my friend and colleague Nick Williams. He is here from the uk…last year it was heaps more fun being able to host him in cape town, so this year my life is a tad different  and we had to make the most of busy jhb.

Amazing that when we have overseas visitors we may go and experience things in the town we  live that we otherwise may not ordinarily do. So last week we found ourselves having fun at the jhb Zoo…..a very odd place for me to visit as the last time I was in a zoo was 20 odd years ago in Malaysia where i burst into tears upon seeeing a grizzly bear in a concrete hole with no shred of greenery, softness or life…..so i have not been a fan ever since.

But it was amaxing to see some life forms and everyone seemed happy…well more or less.  So it felt engaging to witness them all going about their laxy laxy day.

Today however was for nature of a slightly different kind….us humans and our supposed story of evolution. I had heard about Maropeng, seen the huge slabs of concrete at the entrance when passing, and a delegate at the workshop last week was telling us how amazing it was – so we decided a trip of some historical, genetic and cosmic importance was due.

The most striking aspect for me was our total insignificance in the history of evolution!!

Seriously guys…. we are just one little spot in the planet’s history. They depicted the whole of time from time immemorial on a 12 hour clock,  with present day at 12 pm,and literally humans came into existence in the VERY LAST  NANO SECOND!!!!! How frigging freaky is that.

I was immediately struck by the smallness of us as a race, and yet the arrognace, indifference and egotistical way we tend to live on this planet implies that we have been here forever. We rule the universe as if it is our planet to occupy, giving little thought to others who inhabit the world with us. yet in relation to all of history, we occupy very little of it.

I immediately related to the total insignificance of us as humans. Knowing that we are part of something so much bigger and more magnifiscnet that just what we experience…..but the question we got chatting about was where does G-d fit into the theory of evolution and the big bang.

Are the two able to meet somewhere…or are they mutually exclusive concepts that can never find common ground. If big bang is so true, how do we explain phenomena that involve miracles and consciousness. iIdon’t care either way if I am descendant from  apes or not…..I care about who iIam and why I am here and how I fit into the grand scheme of things. But after today, I don’t know that we ever really know this at any level.

I came away reminded of the power of humans to either love oursleves, others and the planet we inhabit, or the total destruction that we can inflict on everything.

It put all of life into some kind of positive perspective…..with the feeling of being positively insignificant top of the list on the day’s learnings.

The power of spring

SPRINGCLEAN YOUR LIFE –

September is the perfect time to do just that!

DOES YOUR LIFE NEED SOME CLUTTER CLEARING, ORGANISING OR JUST A JOLLY GOOD CLEAR OUT OF ALL THE OLD BAGGAGE?

I want to inspire you to look at any areas in your life that need some “tidying up and clutter clearing”. Ask yourself the following question, as odd as it may seems….. AM I READY TO DIE TODAY? In other words is my life up to date or would I have any regrets if today was my last day alive? This does not mean that you want to die, but is more an indication of whether you feel your life is up to date, complete in this moment and fulfilled. Is it? Once you live like this, then you will actually have far more free time and energy to be spontaneous and living in the moment rather than worrying unnecessarily about all the unfinished business or projects that are weighing on your mind. Or do you feel like there are lots of loose ends, things you still want to do and see, and unfinished business to be taken care of? Do you have all your financial affairs in order, and is your estate easy to manage upon your death etc? By keeping everything in your life continuously clear of clutter then its effect will ripple positively into all areas of your life. You will have more space, more time and more creativity due to an abundance or energy when there are no clutter filled areas in your life

DEFINITION OF CLUTTER:- CLUTTER IS ANYTHING THAT NO LONGER SERVES US FOR WHATEVER REASON

This definition of clutter is all inclusive regardless of whether it is an item, a thing, person, attitude, mental belief or even a relationship that no longer serves you in some way. It could even be a build up of toxins in your body. MODERN LIFESTYLES In today’s world we are constantly being bombarded with every single type of BUY BUY BUY, BUY MORE AND BUY BIGGER calls to action. Simplicity is a state of being that seems to have left us with the ice age. We have technological and travel advancements that are realistically meant to speed up the way we do things, and yet we simultaneously have less and less time for the important people, pursuits and passions that are important to us. One family car is definitely not enough, and every technological item is fully obsolete within about half an hour of walking out of the shop where you just acquired it. We are part of the world of consumerism that encourages purchasing way beyond our needs, that facilitates & indeed encourages debt and promotes acquisitions of every description etc. This makes it difficult to keep our lives clear and clutter free. It seems to go against the grain.

But at what cost?

There is nothing at all wrong with the above scenario because abundance and flow are the delights of being human…UNLESS it starts interfering with our resources (such as the space we have available physically to store things), or our energy reserves. If we look for a moment to nature, we see that there is always a system of flow and that nothing (well rarely) in nature is ever stagnant for too long, unless it has been meddled with by us humans. Perhaps there is a way we can look to nature to teach us about cycles, and the natural ebb and flow that exists no matter what, 24/7. It may serve us to emulate this aspect of nature, remembering to let go, pass on and thus flow with all the seasons of life.

SO, DO YOU HAVE ANY CLUTTER IN YOUR LIFE RIGHT NOW? There are actually three main areas you can consider that clutter can gather. All three areas show up differently yet have the same effect of keeping you stuck, stagnant and holding onto stuff that no longer serves you.

PHYSICAL CLUTTER: This is the easiest to recognize, as it is what we most readily associate with the term of phrase “clutter / junk”. It is tangible and clutters our space physically and keeps us very stuck.

CLUTTER ATTRACTS CLUTTER. If we enter an untidy space, we are more likely to simply add to it and not care about the resultant mess. So you have to tackle this with some real vigour to get through all your physical space. Start with something small like one bedside table drawer, and progress from there.

VIBRATIONAL / EMOTIONAL CLUTTER: This aspect is far more difficult to weed out, and requires a different perspective from you to assess what no longer serves you. This refers to unfinished business in your life, and all the unresolved emotional issues that you can’t necessarily “see”, but can feel the negative consequences of. It has a huge impact on how you feel emotionally, mentally and spiritually about life. This type of clutter negatively increases when we negotiate our true values, and do not live with clarity. To get rid of this clutter you need to be brave, have courageous conversations, be honest with yourself and others, create new boundaries, learn to say no when appropriate and lastly get up to date with personal commitments

PHYSIOLOGICAL CLUTTER: We are what we eat, drink, think and feel. What are you putting into your body and what needs to change to improve your va va voom and vitality? If you are holding onto toxins or weight that no longer serves you, you need to take action to get rid of this. It is literally cluttering and clogging up your organs, your blood and the rest of your body. Do what needs to be done to get active again, and at the very least just drink plenty of water.

Kate Emmerson is a professional life coach who supports you on the threshold of making courageous leaps. She’s an expert is assisting you in letting go of all that no longer serves you. She runs e-courses “SPRINGCLEAN YOUR LIFE” that guides you through 28 days of clutter clearing all three areas. She’ll also come into your home to assist you practically.

Is the Bamboo Flowering

Since being up in jhb this year, I have had very little available time or energy for reading for pleasure….quite literally I am working very demanding hours running two different threads of work. So it has taken me over 4 months to complete a beautiful novel that revolves around food, culture and love. It is the best foodie book after “like Water for Chocolate” in my opinion- don’t let the length of time I took to read it be any indication of its beauty.

Written by the same author as “Lost in translation’, Nicole Mones, it is a true travelogue, combined with art, poetry, tragedy,  Chinese culture around the relationship between people and food, love and blossoming bamboo.

If you are ever intrigued by the history of the the REAL CHINESE food, ie not just the krap take aways that we get in the west, along with learning about the intricacies of food and how to prepare it,well you may enjoy this book.

But the bit that I wanted to really share with you came close to then end of the book, when the concept of bamboo blossoming was shared. Bamboo is a funny plant. When you first plant it, it will take up to 5 years to even start showing itself through the soil. But after that it will grow tall and strong and out perform all other plants. But who has the patience to nurture and water something that you can’t even see beneath the ground….it is a bit like our own dreams in that we can’t see them but we have to keep taking action on them until they materialise.

So when the bamboo blossoms, it starts in one part of China. quite literally it will then spread through the entire nation so that all the bamboo blossoms at the same time. After that it all dies, and thus the cycle starts all over again. But the beauty of connection between all the bamboo shoots and the magnifiscence of the display it offers sound quite bewildering and other-worldly.

But it also has a deeper significance..when the bamboo blossoms it signifies the end of an era. liek all the old bamboo that will dies, so too the wheel of fortune changes gear. It also by default heralds the onset of the next cycle to come, so with the end comes the new.

Is the bamboo blossoming in your life, or do you need to hang on just a wee while longer for the change to come..

Why not go and find a book that will inspire you…or try the one mentioned  here

THE LAST CHINESE CHEF by Nicole Mones

The Wonder of Winter

I am re-posting this article as it is relevant time of year again to help you think about winter in a mindful way this year

My writing is always about drawing inspiration and metaphors for life from nature because nature simply follows patterns and unfolds majestically. We can take much needed advice from it to assist us with the “busy-ness” and stress that we deal with constantly. All too often nowadays we are so manically trying to do everything for everybody every day, that we burn ourselves out trying so hard. I am suggesting that we learn to go with the flow of the seasons, harnessing the cycle of life. So, what insights and inspiration can we draw from the season of winter and what do we need to pay attention to over these few months whilst the earth is slumbering?

 

Winter falls over a solstice, which literally translated means “standing in the sun’. For us in the southern hemisphere, the sun will be furtherest north from us, thus creating very short daylight hours and longer nights. This deliciously cold season of winter can gift us several opportunities beyond curling up alone next to a hearty fire with a great book.

 

How do we translate this into our lives?

 

The underlying energy that we can tap into is one of completely and utterly pausing: there is a kind of gentle stillness around us. The wheel of life naturally completes over the solstice on 21^st June, before it can start up again for the year ahead…it is the natural end and beginning of the cycle of the year. This makes it somewhat harder for us living in the southern hemisphere because we usually hold this intention of endings and beginnings over our New Year celebrations in December. We South Africans need to be extra mindful of this mid-year break to re-charge annually. Alongside this “pause” in life, we also greatly benefit from integrating into a more social way of life during winter, where we stop to re-charge our internal batteries by spending time with loved ones.  This is a time to pull together and gather socially to get through the cold winter nights, creating an inner fire of warmth through friendships and sharing. Whilst the energy of winter creates a slowing down and a conserving of energy, it is also an important time to reflect inwardly even more deeply, and find the point of focus for the next stage ahead.

 

I recommend the following practical pointers to take advantage of this wonderful winter energy, particularly around the solstice:

 

1. Start spending about ten minutes quiet time alone every day….such as in meditation, or simply just sitting quietly focusing on your breathing. Become aware of where you are spiritually, mentally and physically at this stage in your life. Be mindful and still. The more you practice the easier it will get.

 

2. Also start journaling a little bit every day to completely reflect your life on paper after the quiet time above. How you are really feeling on the inside? What do you deeply wish for? Your hopes and intentions?  This “ME” time every day is vital for self awareness – remember this is the time for “pausing”.

 

3. As you relax into the quiet time and journaling, try and allow more of your deeper hopes and wishes for the months ahead to filter through. Over autumn I suggested you look long term for the year ahead, and winter is the time to become very resolute and focused on some specific plans for the months ahead. So when the time is right and the energy starts gathering again as the days get longer, what will your plan of action be? Winter is the ideal time to spend on this focused plan, preparing for the activity ahead, and that makes the implementation so much easier down the line. You could call these your “resolutions” for the start of the new cycle.

 

4. Lastly, as close to the solstice as possible, invite your nearest and dearest over….and rather than the bring and share suggested for autumn, this winter season is about being generous and sharing all that YOU have with others. Ideally this should be an outdoor celebration around a huge fire. If this is not possible and you don’t even have an indoor fire, then use as many candles as possible to generate the fire energy. Celebrate that you belong to these friends and family, and this is a great time to share your intentions for the next few months with each other. Also fantastic time for poetry and story telling to celebrate your friendships. Revel in the delights of generosity and togetherness.

 

Enjoy the still, inward energy of winter, and generously sharing with friends, preparing you for the upbeat, outward going movement of life as spring kicks into gear, but more about that next issue.

if you want to celebrate winter with your girlfreinds and live in JHb, then why not come and join me for a White Russian Winterland ladies night

Just keep on keeping on

Sometimes it is all you can do to keep on keeping on. One step at a time, padam padam, prati padakam.

It will not always be effortless, fun, elegant or simple. But it will keep on keeping on. Time marching on is a given, you getting up each day, whether healthy or sick, hung over or full of beans, is going to happen until the day you take your last breath.

I have been doing lots of  BIKRAM yoga again, in an extremely  hot room, whch makes for hectic detoxing and emotional squeezing, and this practice of body, mind and soul is so difficult, that it has been reminding me that “this too shall pass”. Some days I can hold a posture, somedays I can’t, somedays it seems effortless to be strong like a bengal tiger, otherdays I feel like a fluttering fly barely hanging on. But whether weak or strong, good or bad, it passes. So the trick is to NOT get hung up on the external.  Let it go, non attachment. Just like in life.

If I was to panic about the hot air, or the fact that my hip wants to give way as I stand with a my other leg out in front me, or I feel ill and ready to throw up in front of the class (ok so if you have never been to a bikram joya class this may sound a tad extreme, so don’t judge till you have got your ass to a class.)….well then each class would be pure hell.

But the truth is, if I just keep on keeping on, it passes. The air eases, my hip eases, the emotions move and shift and it all goes to a new place.

so my question is, do you get hung up on the external stuff in your life? do you get all reactive, trying to control the outcomes and silly, or are you able to remember that this too shall pass? Something awesome can shift to being ugly, something beautiful can actually be borm out of your hardships in life…nothing is ever the same for very long in reality, so don’t expect it to be and that way you won’t be disappointed.

My gift through Yoga, is to just let go, and keep on…..I wish you the same insight in your life when the going feels tough

Blessings,
Kate

Warm cookies

A friend sent me this as a reminderr of what we ALL need sometimes.

Robert Flughum “ALL I REALLY NEED TO KNOW I LEARNED IN KINDERGARTEN”

• Share everything.
• Play fair.
• Don’t hit people.
• Put things back where you found them.
• Clean up your own mess.
• Don’t take things that aren’t yours.
• Say you’re sorry when you hurt somebody.
• Wash your hands before you eat.
• Flush.
• Warm cookies and cold milk are good for you.
• Live a balanced life – learn some and think some and draw and paint and sing and dance and play and work every day some.
• Take a nap every afternoon.
• When you go out in the world, watch out for traffic, hold hands and stick together.

Is love ever enough?

I have often heard the expression from Michelle and always my body reacted against it, But I am also starting to believe that love alone is not enough to sustain a relationship. I remember my astrologer once telling me that you need three things in a relationship for it to work long term. You need connection (sex!), common goals in life and communication.

When any one or more of these factors breaks down, then the relationship beings to topple. Love is the glue that holds all the above together, but you can absolutely love someone and still not have the makings of an awesome life together. So if love between two people is the given, then it is these other three that need working on and paying attention to in order to stay in love and in connection in your relationship.

Is commitment more important to you than your souls’ happiness. I have been through so much internal and external stress in the past threee months trying to re-engineer my life. My intention for this year was 100% re-alignment, no matter what that meant. If it meant for me personally that I needed to let go of my relationship, then that might be something to consider. When we start down a particular path of action, we can NEVER be sure of where it will take us. You can’t stand at the beginning of a windy path, no matter how beautiful or scary it looks ahead of you, and be able to know all that you will find along the way. Life is about showing up and dealing with what comes your way as you travel the path.

So My partner and I embarked on a journey that we did not know where it was going to end, and for me it still has not ended it is just in a werid place right now for us… there have been a few hailstorms, surpirse tornadoes, some sun and some rain along the way. The path suddenly seems to have got steep with no end end in sight for us, but we have to keep making decisions at every step of the way which fork in the path to follow.  Trust for me is a huge element…..not trying to control each and every outcome, but letting it unfold no matter how uncomfortable, painful and frightening.

So whilst i mourn the loss of one thing, I fund myself also rejoicing in the fact there is change in my life and there is new afoot……and I have no idea what that means down the line for us, but that old, stuck structures we created around us no longer had enough energy and fluidity to sustain both of us in a delicious way…structures that did not serve us are being torn away at a rate of knots, allowing us both hopefully to get to the top of the mountain in tact and able to admire the scenery whilist being connected to all that lives within and around us.

I wish you the ability to make a choice even when you do not know what choice to make

Blessings

Kate

been a while….

When life turns upside down all you can do is let the washing machine tumble you around until the programme stops. Whilist I always sprout about how we can take full control over our lives, there are also times when we need to allow things around us to unfold, and to stop resisting so vehemently. The past month I have been in the washing machine on full speed cycle. I am stonger, more resilient, more determined and more sassy about who I am. I don’t have all the answers, but I have TODAY. I have been practising the one day at a time theory, even when deeply tired from physical exhaustion. I am practising the art of one moment at a time…..it is one the best practices of getting through the tough times that I know. Breathe, let go, and just BE

everything moves in cycles…..which one are you in right now?

Try and not judge where you are…rather take the lessons and the blessings. Being in jhb reminds me how swiftly people do business here without the distraction of my favourite mountain and the sea. Being here also reminds me of the fiery energy that jhb holds, and I am tapping into that to help me shift my world.

Are you waiting for someone else to make your life better?? A poll taken shows….

I received an e-mail today that REALLY got me thinking and go searching on the internet for the related info. It was referring to a recent poll conducted by USA TODAY and GALLUP and was something like this:

WASHINGTON — Americans are as down as they’ve been in decades about the state of the country and its polarized politics, even as they express soaring confidence that Barack Obama will be able to turn things around.

A USA TODAY/Gallup Poll finds stratospheric expectations for the incoming president that his own supporters acknowledge may be unrealistic. A majority of those surveyed say Obama will be able to achieve every one of 10 major campaign promises, from doubling the production of alternative energy to ensuring that all children have health insurance coverage.

Seven in 10 predict the nation will be better off when Obama’s term ends in four years.

Ok so what the heck is the point? As a life coach that is committed to assisting people the BE the change they wish to see, this is fascinating for me to witness. When someone comes along that is gonna shake up history and shift the consciousness of people (for e.g. as Mandela did for us in SA and Obama is doing right now in the USA)- it is always a great way to feel re-energised, hopeful and once again tapped into the power of the human spirit. As Obama now officially leads America into its next chapter, let’s think about the content of the above POLL and how it may reflect in your life….

I do believe that powerful and transformational leaders are necessary to mobilise families, companies and countries, let alone the global family into new ages and new eras of life. The world definitely needs some different leadership right now. The power of someone’s words can elevate the people’s minds and hearts to think differently, act compassionately and experience from true values once again. BUT what about the fact that 7 / 10 people believe that the USA will be better off after his 4 years. You could be DEAD in 4 years!  What kind of power are they handing over to someone they have probably never met, and never will. Please do not mis-read what I am saying, but if you are totally reliant on the head of a country to change your world, then you have got one heck of a surprise coming your way.

 

YOU, that’s right, YOU, need to BE THE CHANGE YOU WISH TO SEE (taken from another transformational leader, Ghandi) and get cracking in your own life today. I admit I sat glued to the TV watching the inauguration of the first African American president, and feel in my heart this is the marking of some necessary changes, but I am not going to sit back and wait for someone else to change my life. The poll showed that the majority of people believe OBAMA will be able to deliver on all 10 of his HUGE commitments. Do you know what those are….they are massive?

Well imagine if you had huge commitments in your own life, and started working progressively to making the changes. Now that would be truly phenomenal, as opposed to sitting around waiting fro someone else to fulfil his promises!

 

I am taking some committed clients on a RE-BOOT your life coaching boot camp starting 2nd FEB. Come on; let’s give Obama some support in making changes by doing them for ourselves.  If everyone mobilised their energy, activated goals and started being responsible for their own happiness, it will make the mammoth task of CHANGE IN THE WORLD a lot easier. That way no matter how well he does or doesn’t do, you will definitely have shifted your world, which spirals and positively affects everyone else!

What will happen if you make huge commitment and promises in your own life?

See you at www.life-coaching.co.za   for the details on a course to fullfill your own commitments.